Jump at Your Own Risk

I visited Sky High Sports in Santa Clara yesterday to attend its AIRobics class with some girls from work. It’s basically a place for children’s birthday parties that consists of like 30 giant trampolines sort of patched together, with another few slanted up the walls, so kids can essentially “bounce off the walls.” There’s also an area with some trampolines and a giant foam pit and another that is used as a dodge ball court.

Sounds fun, right? Um, wrong.

First of all, it’s located in a big huge warehouse with zero ventilation, so it smells and it got unbearably hot during the AIRobics. As we waited in line to sign up, I noticed a girl limping out of the previous class, supported by two friends, with an ankle that was so bruised it was basically black. Ow. Bad sign.

Once we got on our trampolines, it was fun to bounce around for about 10 minutes. Then the class started. Two minutes in, a girl in the front fell, screamed the F word and started bawling. Seems she had also experienced an ankle injury and was rushed out by her boyfriend and a staff member. At this point I wanted to walk out, cause it was clear that the odds of leaving there on two legs were not good.

But I persevered. Next up was an exercise in which you had to jump, fall down on your butt, and bounce back onto your feet. The first time I tried it, I got a sharp stabbing sensation running up my spine. Not good. Maybe I was doing it wrong? I tried twice more and kept feeling pain, so I decided to stand that one out.

As the exercises continued, it became clear that the instructor was just some random guy who worked at the place and had no fitness training whatsoever. The moves he taught were absolutely ridiculous and defied all guidelines of what is safe form for one’s body. For example, I have a feeling that running across some trampolines and throwing your body, shoulder first, into the wall is not a good thing. He also led some more traditional exercises like sit-ups and pushups, but again, I think those are probably not so good to do on a concave, jiggley surface.

The whole place just skeeved me out because you know they don’t wash those trampolines. An the foam pit? Ewww! I can’t even imagine what they’d find in there if they cleaned it out.

Overall, I would say that this is a place for kids and NOT adults (though the majority of girls I went with really liked it). I should at least admit that it was a good workout – I was totally sweating and out of breath. But I’m not really willing to risk life and limb for an exercise class.

P.S. Big congratulations are in order for Steve! He got a well-deserved promotion today! Hooray! He's the best accountant ever!!